Spooky

Donald Trump Congratulates Trick Or Treaters for Not Having "Weight Problems"

The one where the press’s children humored the president.
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Donald Trump meets with children dressed in Halloween costumes at the Oval Office.By Andrew Harrer/Bloomberg/Getty Images.

Halloween’s coming. Scared yet? Of course you are! Living today requires a constant state of fight or flight or that nebulous in-between that is arguing with someone on Twitter. Even once-innocent Halloween traditions are no longer safe. On the eve of the weekend before All Hallows Eve, the White House reporters brought their costumed children to the Oval Office for a photo-op with the president, who is Donald Trump. BOO.

Lulled by the presence of innocents, the president made a couple of mild funnies. “I cannot believe the media produced such beautiful children. How the media did this, I don't know,” he said. “So how does the press treat you? I bet you get treated better by the press than anyone in the world.”

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After what feels like a million years later, he deemed the Darth Vader costume one child wore as "a scary outfit, wow," for reasons that are probably surface level and have nothing to do with the complicated father/son relationships in the Star Wars franchise and/or Trump family. The children, for their part, either nodded or stared blankly in the way kids do when older men try to "razz" them.

The real zinger, though, came towards the end of this decade-long interaction. While filling the silence in the room, he handed out cartons of Hershey Kisses and noted, "You have no weight problems. That’s the good news." Yes, take a lesson from him here. No idea what to say to children? Talk about their weight!

After three or so minutes of sheer torture that you won’t find at the local haunted hayride, it was announced that it was time to go. Trump signed off, saying, "They [the children] can stay. The parents? Not so much." Stay safe out there trick-or-treaters!